SPOILERS
SPOILERS
Double SPOILER alert for those who can't read Spoilers the first time. I saw a thing on spoilers where it was the rule of 2. Two weeks for a movie, two days for a TV episode, and after that, it's up to your own power to avoid spoilers. I thought that was a great rule. If you want to wait until the end of the season to watch a whole season? Then you should tread the internet carefully.
Anyway, my second fave show started up this Tuesday - Face Off. Hannibal is #1 in my heart, but that doesn't start until next year. (REALLY?????).
The episode started out with them going to the Vivianna Center (used to be a church), and half the room was decorated all white and pretty, and the right side of the room was all rotting and black. McKenzie informed us that this season is all about life and death - and that this was their last audition. Well, shit. She's already fucking with them right out of the gate. They have four hours in which to win their place on the show, with two of them not even getting to move into the house. THAT blows. Even if I was the first one off the show, you better believe I'd be using that lap pool they have in their yard that first day.
We're introduced to a lot of people as they scramble to try and get either life or death. It involves a pile of men on the floor (sounds a lot hotter than it actually was). This is the time of the season where it's hard to keep people straight. They're all super nervous, and I don't envy them trying to win a spot on the show in which is essentially a Foundation challenge. They don't get the three days to make something more involved, so you know we're going to see some rough ones.
Some of the more memorable people thus far are Cig Neutron, Dina, Kealeghn (I don't think I spelled that right), and Doc. Cig because of his name, and because his hat has a little head on it, and on the reveal stage, he's wearing some sort of old-timey aviator's hat with horns and shit. Okay, he's the kooky one. Dina because she was a cake decorator. I didn't need to hear anything after CAKE. Kealaghn of the hard to spell name because not only is her hair an azure blue, but so are her eyebrows, and Doc because not only does he have big spikey hair, but I guess he's tried out for every season of Face Off thus far. And never made it until now. I wonder if there's a reason for that.
So, they're all frantically working to find a concept around a piece that they're given. Some of them want to use whatever face piece or other pre-made prosthetic they're given in different ways. Some of the ideas in this field are okay. Some are shit. Like an older bald dude named Scott. He was in the pile on the floor when the mad dash started. A blonde girl named Sasha gets a cyborg-like gear forehead, but decides to use it on the model's hand because she has another concept of Raven Maven (which is the stage name of a friend of mine as well!), a crow-like guardian of a graveyard.
While they're working, McKenzie tells them to stop and come to her. Now she's just being sadistic, but I'd crawl on the floor if McKenzie beckoned me. I love that woman. So, now they have to add another piece (that's been chosen for them already) to their makeups, which is URGH. It's going to make shitty makeups even shittier, and is going to frig with some peoples' concepts. But, the blow is softened by a special guest that has EVERYONE geeking out, even McKenzie. ROBERT FUCKING ENGLUND! When he kisses McKenzie's hand, she looks like she's going to pee her pants, which is awesome. It just reminds me even more that she's not just a pretty face, like many reality TV hosts. She does know about makeup, and studied it before getting into acting under her father's tutelage. But she also geeks out about guests and stuff.
So, after 4 hours, time's up. Some of the makeups are really, really awesome. Like Dina of the cake decorating, Keaghlan of the blue hair, and Vincent, a guy who actually won an Emmy under Michael Westmore for Deep Space Nine. That's pretty awesome. I wonder if Mr. Westmore will remember him? Sasha, who used her gear forehead on the hand as jewelry, actually has a piece that turned out really well.
Bald-headed Scott definitely makes the roughest, shittiest piece. It's got a REALLY cool helmet with this spikey scythe thing coming out the top, but he was on the Life side, and it looks like a REALLY REALLY bad Haunted House makeup. Another one who has a really bad one is an older lady named Gabby. She shoehorned a concept into what they were given, and of course it didn't work out. That never works. A guy with really red long hair named Jason has one where he put giant chipmunk cheeks on it, and it looks really lopsided. It's not popular with Glenn and Neville. Ve is not there because she's on the set of Mockingjay.
So, after Glenn and Neville look at all the models, they said that all the contestants will have to go back to their hotel and wait until tomorrow on the reveal stage to find out who's won and lost. Okay, I officially feel sorry for all these people right now. I don't think many of them got much sleep. Hopefully they at least got put up in a luxury hotel after all the 'over a barrel' action they had to suffer through.
So, Ve joins them the next day, but she's not going to be around much because of Mockingjay, so they're bringing on a new judge, who is also an Oscar winner - Lois, who won her Oscar for Braveheart. She has a silver and iron bob that if it were black, she'd look like Edith Head, or Edna from The Incredibles. She's even got the glasses. But she has a no-nonsense British accent, unlike Edna.
So, Dina the cake decorator wins with a pretty wood sprite. She put these water-like veins on it by piping paint through a make-shift icing bag. That's thinking on your feet. Blue K (I'm just gonna call her that for now because I keep misspelling her name), and Sasha are also on the top, along with Vincent. I love his. He got rib bones as his second item, and he used them line antennae.
On the bottom is Scott of course, and before they can even talk about more looks after his, he gets booted off. Ouch. Gabby also gets booted off. Not a good season for the older folks, huh? But, Doc made it. So I guess he doesn't have to worry about trying out for Season 8. He's only 24, so I imagine he must have started trying out really young.
After the first episode, I always try to pick my horse in this race. I think mine is going to be CAKE LADY Dina. Because CAKE. And because hers was awesome. Apparently she quit her job before coming on the show, so it's good that she didn't unceremoniously get booted off.
I also try to choose El Douche, which is a harder choice. Sometimes peoples' dickheadedness doesn't come out until much later. In season 3 with Joe, that was a gimme, but with so many faces, and so little screentime for most of them, it's hard to choose. I usually give myself two or three eps to choose a person to wish off the show.
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